Final Crisis Comic Book Reviews for 05/21/08 - Updated

For all you nighthawks, here's the late night edition of the Final Crisis Comic Book Reviews! This covers just about everything left on my pull list with the only exceptions being Catwoman and Ultimate X-Men. I didn't leave them out due to the quality of the issues. It was just a time thing. I'll do my best to get them up tomorrow. Avengers: The Initiative was a joy to read and I think everyone should give this done-in-one issue a chance. Anyways, I'm off to bed, enjoy the reviews!

UPDATE - Added Catwoman and Ultimate X-Men reviews. Also, I've added Second Opinions to Batman and the Outsiders and Mighty Avengers.

Second Opinions are a new thing I'll be trying whereby I add reader comments which I think are thoughtful or insightful critiques of one of my reviews or a book that deserve to be spotlighting in the main article.

If you've posted something noteworthy before or something that sparked conversation between other commenters or myself, don't feel left out, as this is the first time I've thought of doing something like this and I'm sure you'll get a chance to see your name in the stars (=p) and spotlighting as a Second Opinion in the future.

Again, enjoy the reviews and I'll catch you guys later for the Moments of the Week!

AVENGERS: THE INITIATIVE #13
Written by Christos Gage
Art by Steve Uy

Few comics have been as fun, charming and as entertaining as this issue of Avengers: The Initiative. Butterball came out of no where to usurp the crown as my new favourite Initiative recruit. However, Slott and Gage giveth and Slott and Gage taketh away, as Butterball and his unique powerset wash out of training camp by the end of the issue, most likely never to be seen again.

After last issue's graduation ceremony, the call goes out for new recruits and answering it is a rather motely crew of freaks, geeks, nobodies, has beens and never were's. I won't bother introducing anyone outside of Prodigy, because he rocks and I actually know his name, because I have no clue if any of these guys will be around in six months time and I don't know if I want to bother getting to know them that well. I'll mainly just sit back and enjoy the ride. So, for now, we have Bat Guy, Fire Girl, Cyborg Dude and Black Girl (does she have powers?), as well as the afforementioned Butterball and Prodigy.

The opening bus ride is hilarious and Butterball, who wants to be known as Boulder, immediately steps up as a likeable and funny "comic nerd turned super hero". He harrasses Hank Pym about being a hero and brings up the touchy subject of Captain America. You can feel the tension as Pym gives him the look of death after hitting that touchy subject. The funny thing is, he's not trying to be annoying and comes off as genuinely sincere and honest, which is refreshing and fun to read. Prodigy gets in on the Hank ribbing with the pre-requisite, "*coughWifeBeater*cough*", comment.

We then get an extended montage (hey, it worked for Rocky) of the new recruits training at the hands of Taskmaster, who narrates and reports to Pym and War Machine. He's the one that immediately singles out "Boulder" and sticks him with the Butterball name. Turns out, Butterball is invincible, literally. He can't be harmed, smothered, starved, poisoned, pierced, etc. However, his body is locked into a sort of permanent state and metabolism, making it so he can't lose or gain weight, get any stronger or weaker, can't grow and can't even feel anything. So, while being unkillable, he has no actual tactical abilities that can be put to real use (although, I'd just hook him up with some hi-tech gear or Pym particles, personally and let him have at it).

This leads to the recruits' breaking curfew and going out for some drinks on the beach. While everyone is swimming, Fire Girl, who normally burns everyone she touches, starts hooking up with the first human she's ever been able to touch, Butterball! Unfortunately, the poor boy, as stated, can't feel anything. Ya, he's got a future in ED and Viagra commercials, but has no chance of scoring with this girl and makes a hasty getaway with the team's wheels.

This leads him to encounter Taskmaster, War Machine and other security detail out looking for them. He takes the blame for the others, but, before they can all sneak back to camp, some villains with a contract out for Taskmaster jump them all and the recruits join in to help, sparking a mini-brawl.

When all seems lost for the villains, one of them takes a hostage, yes, you guessed it, Butterball, and threatens to kill him if they move a muscle and, like clockwork, they all train their weapons on him to comical effect.

Sadly, just as we were getting to love Butterball, he's washed out of the Initiative and sent on his way. Taskmaster, the man with a heart of gold, takes pity on the kid, since he did help save his bacon when the contract killers came after him, and offers to give the kid a souviner of his days with the academy, knowing full well all Butterball wanted was to be a hero and Taskmaster gave him nothing but hard times during training. As such, he and Constrictor "pose" for a picture with him. Said picture features Butterball standing victorious over the defeated "villains", a picture Butterball proudly hangs on his wall as he tells his mom he's home from the best time he's ever had in his life.

One of the most heart warming and fun comics I've read in a while. Since it's almost all new characters, no excuse for not picking this gem up.

Verdict - Must Read


BATMAN AND THE OUTSIDERS #7
Written by Chuck Dixon
Art by Carlos Rodriguez and Bit

While I admit to indulging in some guilty pleasures by reading this title, I'm starting to lose interest quickly. This issue progressed what little story there is in the bare minimum of baby steps and gave us no real action or plot progression to speak of, leaving me feeling a bit cheated with the purchase.

Metamorpho escapes the zombie crew on the station and hi-jacks a spacecraft and heads home, but not before a quick jetison into space courtesy of the mind controlled crew.

Our captured Outsiders get a few scenes of them being tortured, which just painted the Great Ten as incompetent in every way, and we're left with them about to be executed at the end of the issue.

Batgirl, the only one who wasn't captured, sneaks around with her katana, opting to continue the whole stealth dealy. She has a "plan" though, so I guess she'll save the team next issue.

Batman does...stuff. I'm not sure what, but he does it. It may or may not have involved making sandwiches.

Verdict - Avoid It

Second Opinion - Dork's Take

Batman and the Outsiders is much better than you give it credit for. It's biggest detriment is, I bet, that DC told the writer that this title does not matter. It has hurt titles before (their sales), notably: Untold Tales of Spider-Man. But that is just one title among several in history.

That does not matter. Not just because this comic is good despite that, but because it is so good it will force itself into importance in DC continuity.

The only unusual character starring in this book that I'm a fan of is Batgirl. Thunder, Grace, Metamorpho and Katana are all new to me. And not only are all these character suddenly significant, but they are undergoing significant character arcs. How can anyone not love Thunder having been introduced to her in this series? She's undisciplined but infinitely compassionate.

There are a lot of cool scenes in this issue. If this issue was said to be important to DC continuity or the event title Final Crisis, I think several scenes alone would be enough to give this title a higher rating. The opening in the Batcave. Batgirl about to whoopass more than once. Metamorpho in mortal danger, in and out of space. A cool cameo. A cool cliffhanger. And the least interesting scenes to me were still interesting cliffhangers and development: Langstrom and the OMAC/ReMAC.

You underestimate this issue. You should read it again. I really, really think you might give it a different review.

Verdict - Must Read

CATWOMAN #79
Written by Will Pfeifer
Art by David Lopez and Alvaro Lopez

Thank god that Salvation Run fiasco has ended or, at least, the Catwoman tie-ins are over. The book makes a drastic leap in quality thanks to it and, while those issues weren't terrible, it's good to see her back in the street level setting of Gotham and picking up where things left off several months ago with The Thief and her apartment being destroyed and life gutted.

Wasting little time on explanations, probably due to the last issue of Salvation Run not being out yet, Pfeifer simply shows Catwoman materializing in downtown Gotham, similar to the cover image, and celebrating at being back.

Not to be fooled twice, since she was locked in an alien simulation, during Salvation Run, which made her believe she was back in Gotham, she quickly "acquires" a cellphone and calls Slam Bradley to confirm she's back in the real Gotham. As he's currently occupied with the Jamie Madrox knock-off villain, she gets a few last words from Slam as to his location and makes off to save him.

These leads to some nice action as she makes short work of the scrub villain and saves Slam, giving us some actual character development between the two as they discuss Helina, Selina's daughter and Slam's grandchild, where Catwoman's been and how she "died" (thanks to Batman) pre-Salvation Run. It was nice to be back to this kind of setting and some actual worthwhile interactions.

We end the issue with the villain getting away, which Catwoman allowed by faking injury, and she's set to follow him and find The Thief and put an end to the man who stole her life from her.

Verdict - Must Read

FANTASTIC FOUR #557
Written by Mark Millar
Art by Bryan Hitch

The short and dirty of it all is that the current Millar / Hitch Fantastic Four is just plain fun. It's not mind blowing or even highly original. He applies tried and true methods with a small bit of high concept, stirs in some family dynamics and spits out some classic style Fantastic Four stories with the right amount of modern twist to make them work. We won't be remembering these stories in 20 years time like we do the Stan Lee era stories, but they're definitely fun stories in their own right and I'm more than pleased with their work, even if it's not Ultimates level quality.

This issue, however, sees a rather passe ending to the CAP robot storyline. After being built up with its defeat of Sentry, Iron Man, all the Initiative and even the anti-Registration heroes, Reed slaps together a giant, "referenced" movie Optimus Prime robot, which he claims is a Galactus killer, switches it on, at a billion dollars per second cost, and waits for CAP to come stop the most powerful weapon on Earth, as is its current programming objective.

Not to bad, I guess. I like giant robot action and this could be interesting, right? Well, Reed also guessed that his ex-flame would have built in the same safeguard that kept her off the naughty list of targets for CAP, seeing as he knows she still has feelings for him, and the robot, unable to attack Reed, just stands there as Reed destroys him in seconds with his giant Galactus killing robot, ending a much ballyhoo'd threat that turned into a paper tiger in the end.

All was not lost, however, as we did have some fun moments, like Reed's, "the robot's helmet makes it look cooler", reasoning for the design or Reed's blowing off his old girlfriend and then having a date in the past, on the day they first met, with Sue for their anniversary.

So, while not a great issue and probably the worst of their run, it wasn't a complete loss. Oh yeah, did I mention Dr Doom shows up on the last page, his armour hanging off him and looking like he was nearly beaten to death, as he screams for them to bring Richards to him now? Ya, that's awesome, too, but not enough to make this a great issue. Can't wait for next month's though.

Verdict - Check It


IRON MAN: DIRECTOR OF SHIELD. #29
Written by Stuart Moore
Art by Roberto De La Torre

As someone that's been following the Knaufs' run on Iron Man: DoS, even if I didn't already know it was a guest writer, I was able to notice the change in voice, specifically in the narrative and style, of the writing for this issue. This immediately pulled me out of the story and made it less enjoyable on the whole for me. Others probably won't even notice the difference, as it's not as drastic a change as Fraction's Invincible Iron Man.

As the first of a four part story, this issue was concerned with setting up the plot. As such, we see Iron Man just "relaxing" in his new role as Director of SHIELD as he engages in a field op with his Alphas (the SHIELD agents in Iron Man-like armours), strictly in an agent role and supposedly letting Maria Hill lead the op.

The op was a "simple" search for nuclear devices supposedly planted by terrorists in a foreign country. After one goes off, Tony quickly finds the second and sees that it's far from the ordinary bomb. It's miniturized, has no nuclear fallout and is incredibly sophisticated. He struggles to disable it and uses his Batman-like prep time armour modifications to defuse it in time. As it was a small bomb and there was no fallout, the bomb that went off did relatively little damage to an abandoned part of the town.

From here, though, the story quickly gets convuluted and goes down hill. We're introduced to Nicolas Weir, "the other Nick Fury". I don't recall who he is, so I'm not sure if he's new or not, but he's a little upset with Tony Stark for making him and his wonderful gadgets obsolete with his Alphas and fancy armour, so he decides to rebuild a super weapon that nearly started WW3 during testing by SHIELD.

His nanobots go to work modifying and repairing the device and, just as he's found by SHIELD agents, the machine comes to life on its own and looks very Phalanx or techno-organic-like in nature. Weir quickly makes his escape and leaves the SHIELD troops to die.

Tony eventually reveals to us that the terrorist that claimed responsibility for the bombings is none other than Nasim Rahimov, a former classical pianist and connoisseur of Belgian Ales (wonder how, hic, Tony met him?). Rahimov's wife once painted the finest portrait of Tony Stark. Seeing as Rahimov has one arm, I'll guess Tony somehow is responsible for that and I'm also guessing that he was invovled in the wife's death. However, I don't know who this guy is or if he's even an old villain or if he's being made solely for this storyarc.

Simply put, this has the plot and story of the more super hero-like Invincible Iron Man, but is written in the dark / gritty / realistic / noir style that the Knaufs employ, making it read awkward for me. Maybe it's just the fact it's different that's throwing me off and others will enjoy this more than I did.

Verdict - Check It


MIGHTY AVENGERS #14
Written by Brian Michael Bendis
Art by Khoi Pham

We see a flashback to an "old" Sentry story set in the past. In fact, it's the same one we've seen two other times before and is the scene of the Sentry stopping the Void from robbing a bank, the goons shooting the Sentry, bullets bouncing off and so on that was most recently seen in the Dr Doom time travel story and is a reprint of a story Paul Jenkins did on the Sentry when he first came into the Marvel Universe.

However, this time around, everyone hates the Sentry (relatively speaking) and wish Thor was there to save them. Also, Sentry starts babbling about how he killed the Void and begins crying.

Suddenly, a Skrull ship comes out of the sky and tries to go 9/11 on the Baxter Building in some cosmic jihad. Sentry stops them, but the ship explodes in space as the Skrulls simply pray to their gods. The explosion was enough to knock out the Sentry for a period of time and he wakes up in the Fantastic Four's HQ, no worse for the wear.

We later flash to a scene where "Jarvis" requested more information from Tony Stark on the Sentry so as he doesn't turn out like the Scarlet Witch. This was scene after the Ultron arc, if I remember correctly. He uses this information to find a weakness for the Sentry and learn more about him. He takes the info to a Skrull meeting, consisting of Hank Pym, what looks like Spider-Woman and several other unrecognizable Skrulls. They discuss, in the most blatant Bendis-speak I've witnessed to date, how to neutralize the Sentry and the Jarvis Skrull, in full Bendis mode, goes on about the Void and describes exactly how to stop him, which mirrors the events in the Savage Land in SI#2. Most are concerned at his strength and unknown power limits and if it will endanger the plan, but opt to go with the "lol, he's crazy, this'll be easy" plan.

Finally, we get to the Savage Land in the present day. Sentry goes nuts, starts crying and flies off into space. It looks like he punched a human sized hole in Saturn's rings, but the art made it kind of difficult to figure out what was going on there.

Meanwhile, the Super Skrull army attacks the Sentry's home and, just as one is about to re-kill the Sentry's wife, she's saved at the last minute by...the Voidtry? It's a Void-black coloured Sentry who speaks in black text balloons and tells her that Bob couldn't handle it, so he's come to save her as she screams, "No", and is crying at the thing calling itself her husband.

Verdict - Sentry's Nuts LOL (Check It, I Guess?)

Second Opinion - Dork's Take

It's hard to believe that the writer of Mighty Avengers knows that he's writing in the comic format. It doesn't matter what goes in what panels where. I don't think the writer knows or cares. It might even be better just reading the scripts! I found it barely legible and incoherent as storytelling. There was not even a narrative line throughout the issue. Just terrible!!

You tepidly gave it a positive review---or at least a recommendation to check it. If this title wasn't advertised, hyped and interviews to 'matter' or be 'important' ("change the universe FOREVER!"), I don't think you would have done that. If this issue was said to have the importance, or lack of, as Batman and the Outsiders, I think you might have said to avoid it. The art is lacking. Although, that may be just in comparison to other titles I read. I tend not to read in mass monthly.

I don't know how to stress enough how bad Mighty Avengers works in the format. Talk bubble monologues that just sprawl over several unimportant panels. It's terrible writing and needs to be fixed.

I say avoid it, or readers might get the wrong impression of the entire MEDIUM. Not just genre or anything else. It is an awful repellent to comics. This issue would make a reader question why they would want any story or idea in this format. I'm looking at it more as I write this and... awful!!! And I'm a superhero fan.

Verdict - Avoid It

ROBIN #174
Written by Chuck Dixon
Art by Chris Batista and Cam Smith

This was an elegant resurrection of Stephanie Brown, aka the Spoiler, if you can call the resurrection of a blatantly on-screen death elegant.

Yes, Spoiler is, well, Spoiler. And that's me giving you a spoiler on who the Spoiler is. The short explanation is that Leslie faked Spoiler's death back during War Games. Spoiler suggests that she thought she had suffered enough for a girl her age and so they swapped her with an overdosed drug addict's body.

Batman, being the king of preptime and omniprescent in the DCU, was actual only partially aware of this. He didn't know if she was alive or not, but had his suspicion and, as such, opted not to put a trophy case up until he was sure she was really dead.

Tim took this rather well and immediately grabbed Stephanie and gave her a big bear hug and kiss, lifting her clear off the ground. A bit inconsistent with the "love of his life", Wonder Girl, over in Teen Titans, but no one likes her anyways.

If you haven't read the issue, I'm sure this sounds like a mess of a resurrection on paper, but, trust me, it's actually worked really well and I honestly believe it's one of the better handled resurrections when all's said and done.

Of course, I'm a big Spoiler fan, so I'm looking at this through some rose coloured glasses and just happy she's back, so take this with a grain of salt, as well. But I am trying to be impartial, so I don't think I'm being too generous when I say these things.

On the non-Spoiler side of things, there was one scene that really made me laugh out loud, which is rare for a comic to do. They had a rather generic fight at the beginning of the issue that carried over from last month and, as they ended the fight rather quickly with a bunch of explosions and cars and what have you, it cut to the Penquin turning his TV off and proclaiming it was the "typical Hollywood Tripe. Lots of explosions and an unsatisfying conclusion." It caught me off guard and I was roaring at it since it was a pretty damn accurate description of the opening fight scene. It was made all the funnier as this was the only appearance of the Penquin in the issue, making it stand out even more in my mind.

Verdict - Must Read (Check It if you don't care about Spoiler)


ULTIMATE X-MEN #94
Written by Aron Coleite
Art by Mark Brooks

I'm as big a fan of Robert Kirkman as the next person and personally love his Walking Dead, Invincible and Ant-Man books, but thank god his reign of terror on the Ultimate X-Men title has ended. It's so refreshing to read this book and have it actually be, well, good again.

Coleite decides to use one of the newer and under utilized X-Men storylines for his debut arc in the form of MGH, Mutant Growth Hormone. They call it Banshee, officially, but Wolverine drops the MGH, among others, name of the drug to clue readers in on what it is.

While it's only his opening issue, I was more than impressed with his use of it and the characterizations he used for the team. Xavier was, surprisingly, missing the entire issue, but the rest of the team, and even some from Emma Frost's academy, are together playing baseball, a traditional X-Men past time.

Seemingly ignoring most of what Kirkman did, Jean Grey has returned to the team and refuses to explain or speak to Scott, or anyone, about what occured and I'm more than happy that he's ignoring that Pheonix / Apocalypse nonsense. There are still concerns about her power and instability, though.

During the baseball game, we get some reconcilliation between Colossus and Nightcrawler, who is no longer the homophobic pyschopath who ran away from the team, was disgusted at his best friend Colossus being gay and kidnapped Dazzler. Those still happened, but Coleite is doing his best to heal those wounds / retcon that mess.

This leads to the crux of the story, the introduction of Alpha Flight, who consist of some of the 616 version members, but with some nice redesign costumes and Jubilee(!), who is weilding some Boomer-like energy balls instead of the useless firework sparkles. They've arrived to reclaim one of their own from the X-Men. No, it's not the generic "let's retake Wolverine" story. It's actually for Northstar this time, who is Colossus' boyfriend and a member of Emma's school. Seems he ran away from the Canadian funded team and they want him back.

The Alpha Flight entry was fairly dynamic with Iceman, in ice form, shattering as he ran towards the team to warn them. It's okay, as he's humpty dumpty and Beast put him back together by the end of the issue, so he's not dead, but it was a nice addition to the Ultimate powers of Iceman. After this, they mop the floor with like 25 of the X-Men at the baseball game and make off with Northstar, but not before Colossus does his best to try and stop them.

We then get the in-fighting as the team decides what to do. Colossus is deadset on finding Northstar and Cyclops wants to think it through since they got their asses handed to them by five guys. Jean senses something wrong with Colossus and we get an extended flashback of his past and it's revealed he's the equivilent of a 50kg weakling and he can barely lift his own arm when his body is covered with his metal form. This lead the mafia to giving him Banshee to make him go all Mark McGuire and we get more clues as to just what Banshee does to people.

Cyclops is pissed Jean invaded his thoughts like that and Colossus is furious and actually attacked Jean before the fight was quickly broken up. This leads to the schism in the team with Colossus leading a secret mission to reclaim Northstar that consists of several X-Men, all pumped on Banshee, including Cyclops, Rogue, Nightcrawler and a few others, leaving in a Blackbird at the end of the issue.

Verdict - Must Read


X-MEN: DIVIDED WE STAND #2
Written by Mike Carey, C.B. Cebulski, Duane Swierczynski & Andy Schmidt
Art by Scott Eaton, David Lafuente & Frazer Irving

This was nothing like the first X-Men: Divided We Stand issue. The drop in quality is as apparent as night and day. To compare it to something from DC, issue one was like 52 while this is like Countdown. One told an engaging story that setup future storylines and had meaningful resolutions. The other was a trainwreck of a story who's only purpose was to hit a bunch of key notes to move people in position for the next big event.

This issue, unfortunately, would be the latter of that comparison. As such, I'll describe the events in a Countdown-like manner.

Forge is upset everyone breaks into his glass doored apartment and beats him up. After getting knocked out, shot and robbed by Bishop, again, he decides to build a mousetrap of a home so he can live in peace and build some crazy inventions.

Beast has no confrontation with Dark Beast, as the solicit stated, and simply shuts down and destroys any potential threats remaining in the ruins of the X-Mansion, which is literally a slab of concreate with a few crumbled walls, hardly even a building anymore, which is odd, considering the Young X-Men are living there currently and none of this is reflected there.

Surge goes to see Dani and has a heart to heart about how she sucks as a leader and is self destructive and hates her life. They swap sob stories and then look at the pretty sunset.

Havok is imprisoned by Vulcan and listens to his teammates being tortured. Vulcan decides to play Mr Wikipedia and describes Messiah Complex for anyone that has no clue what happened there. Havok then destroys the vid screen, ending the conversation.

Finally, Illyana decides to use the power of love to get her soul back. She takes a visit to the X-Mansion to see Colossus and Kitty, but the place is destroyed. As this is an everyday occurance, I'm surprised she went off the deep end and switched to deciding revenge and suffering is the answer to getting her soul back, but I digress. Her little demon watch has one gem in its socket and four remaining. I assume Pixie is responsible for one of the gems, so I guess this will be picked up in Uncanny X-Men, where Pixie is joining the team?

Waste of money. Just skip it and pretend the first issue was the only one that ever came out.

Verdict - Avoid It

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